Biblical Driving Schools

Travelling behind a car yesterday which was advertising a driving school, it was ‘Madina Driving’, a reference to one of the famous places in Islam that Mohammed spent much of his time based at, and where some parts of the Qu’ran were written.

And it made me think about what Biblical places one could use to name a driving school, and what their significance would be…

Jericho Driving School… likely you’ll end up involved in a smash and grab raid (car also has an impressively loud horn).

Bethlehem Driving School… when you arrive at your destination, all the parking spaces will already be full.

Damascus Driving School… lessons may end abruptly when dazzle blinds the driver.

Emmaus Driving School… you and the instructor pick up a hitchhiker who seems strangely familiar…

Sodom Driving School… renowned for aggressive tail-gating… lady drivers not advised to use their rear-view mirrors, and beware of the road gritter.

Canaan Driving School… after getting hopelessly lost for ages, car finally grinds to a halt just before reaching its destination, mechanics discover milk and honey in the gas tank.

Nineveh Driving School… you clock up 8 points on your license before even getting to the test centre… but a day in court, showing real remorse before the judge clears your record… the traffic warden who clocked you is furious… you give him a potplant, but it dies… he goes off despondent.

And people?

Job’s Driving School… through no fault of your own, and despite driving impeccably on the day of the test, the Driving Examiner fails you on all counts, your BMW is impounded, and when your friends turn up to give you a lift home, they all nag you about your bad driving too… but the joke is on them, when a judge overturns the DVLA’s decision, and with the compensation, you buy a Ferrari to replace your previous car… your mates are under investigation for car-theft, but you have a word with the judge and they get off.


About Jemma

Learning to be both a priest and a human being in the Anglican Church
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